Zahra* woke up in the middle of the night at around 3:30am on 8 April just before the ceasefire was announced. She could hear the hum of electricity. “Thank god,” she said. “The power hasn’t gone out.”

The buzz of devices and appliances in her home in Iran were a sign that the country hadn’t been bombed as promised by President Donald Trump, when hours earlier, he had made the unprecedented threat to completely destroy the entirety of Iranian civilisation.

But the relief was short-lived and was immediately followed by dread.

“On the one hand, I was happy they hadn’t hit the power plants, but immediately after that happiness there was a strange fear. A kind of freezing feeling took over me,” she told The Independent. “What is going to happen to us now in their [the Islamic Republic’s] hands? It felt like that fear quickly erased the joy.”

As a fragile US-Iran ceasefire nears its end and talk moves to opening the Strait of Hormuz, Iranians are entering the 50th day of an internet blackout that has cut the country off from the rest of the world. News trickles into the west through smuggled messages, voice notes and coded communications that are sent at great personal risk.

The Independent has collected a number of these rare testimonies of life under the shutdown. All while the Iranian government enforces a brutal crackdown on dissent, executing dissidents and arresting thousands amid the most hostile climate of suspicion the country has seen in years.

Voice notes and stories were shared with the publication under the threat of surveillance by the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) and fear of reprisals.

Within the accounts, a vivid picture emerges of the everyday lives of ordinary Iranians, exhausted by economic crisis and vicious conflict, confused and fearful of the future.

“In the beginning, connecting to the internet was something we did with fear and trembling, buying small amounts — around one or two gigabytes,” continues Zahra, a mother in Iran.

“The three of us [in our family] would connect together… enough for just one or two text messages on Telegram and reading a few tweets, and then that connection link would be cut off.

“All of us received messages from the IRGC Intelligence Organization saying that you are under surveillance because you have gone online.”

When a 14-day Pakistan-brokered ceasefire was announced, feelings across Iran were mixed. Grateful for a break from the anxiety of constant shelling, many people’s thoughts inevitably turned to the terror of an unchanged future.

Zahra says her sister “felt so bad and her body became so cold that she didn’t know what to do until she could come to terms with herself” upon the announcement of the ceasefire. But their 73-year-old mother was “extremely happy” and celebrated the event by congratulating her family.

Even among the Islamic Republic’s supporters, feelings are mixed about the ceasefire. One supporter who has children in the notorious Basij paramilitary group and is very close to the IRGC is said to have been “very happy” about the ceasefire”, according to Zahra. Meanwhile, over 100 members of the woman’s extended family were described as remaining frightened.

People in Iran have developed innovative ways to stay connected to the outside world. Using Starlink connections and countless VPNs, many are paying extortionate prices for as little as 1GB of data. Zahra and others used this limited access to pass messages to London at great personal risk.

Meanwhile, a “white SIM card” (called “bloody SIM” card by the Iranian government’s opponents) are available to around 200,000 people in the country, but function as “instruments of propaganda”, says Zahra.

She says individuals excusing the blackout point to the fact that banking services, medical services, medications, healthcare networks and domestic shopping through apps such as Digikala and other vendors are functioning smoothly without any problems. Education also largely continues as normal.

“According to them, we have no problem whatsoever in terms of the internet because healthcare systems, banking, shopping, and education are functioning,” she says. “But, the internet is something that is connected to the whole world, and you cannot make this argument or offer this justification that we have no problems just because some things are functioning.”

Zahra says the lack of internet access is also impacting the economy. Iran’s most widely-read newspaper said that $1.3bn had already been lost. Groceries are difficult to purchase and Zahra says layoffs are widespread. Even Iranian state media estimates the cost to rebuild will be north of $270bn, but analysts told the Wall Street Journal it is difficult to estimate accurately at this stage.

“When they say shopping works, they are completely lying. Shopping depends largely on searching with Google. We usually don’t know the address of a store and we use Google search to find what we need and compare prices.”

Reza* spent days preparing for a blackout in the aftermath of Trump’s threats to totally destroy Iran’s energy infrastructure and send it to the “Stone Age”.

“I felt a bit relieved,” he told The Independent. “I was worried that attacks on infrastructure would seriously disrupt daily life.”

But, like Zahra, the feeling was immediately followed by fear. “I’m concerned that an agreement might be reached without considering the people of Iran, one that further restricts their freedoms and normal life.”

He adds: “Most of the people around me feel down and discouraged, they are worried that the war might end without bringing any meaningful improvement to their lives.”

Speaking via voice note, he told The Independent that beyond discussions on nuclear weapons and the Strait of Hormuz, he wants to see issues “related to human rights, civil liberties and guaranteed free communication with the rest of the world” included in negotiations or potential agreements. But he is discouraged by the “maximalist demands” on both sides.

Amir*, a medical professional, said the people around him are “afraid of what a monster this regime could become after this war if fundamental changes don’t occur”.

“Internet would be gone, as it is, and there would be less freedom of everything,” he told The Independent. “We will suffocate.”

The Independent also spoke to a member of the Iranian diaspora based abroad who has been in touch with their family in Iran. They say education at schools and universities has moved fully online with teachers and students no longer needing to leave home due to relying on domestic internet for remote learning.

But they said that family say “inflation has surged, prices have skyrocketed and basic goods are beyond reach for many.”

In addition, many people have lost their jobs, they are told. Especially those working in the private sector with numerous factories laying off staff. Furthermore, bombardments very close to schools in the local area have caused fear and concern.

After the ceasefire, the streets have “come alive again”, but this diaspora member was told by a family member: “Now that the ceasefire has been imposed, more people are getting out into the streets, but we are really worried about what’s going to happen next.”

Omid*, a young man living in the capital, like many others has “mixed” feelings about the ceasefire.

“On the one hand, the ceasefire removed the immediate threat of military strikes and bombings, which brought a sense of safety and the possibility of starting over,” he says.

“On the other hand, the current regime in Iran has not made any meaningful change, not even a minimal one that would benefit the Iranian people, and the situation may have become even more difficult.”

But there is a perception that even if a temporary agreement is reached in the coming months, “conditions in the region will once again change in line with Israel’s will.”

Iran has insisted that Lebanon be included as part of any long-term ceasefire agreement, and while a tenuous deal has been reached in the interim, Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu has made clear his mission to defeat Hezbollah for threats to Israel’s borders.

Others feel the same, he says: “Part of the population is in a state of waiting, expecting news that war will not break out again.

“Another part is saddened by the military attack on the country, the destruction of industrial and civilian infrastructure, and the killing of civilians. And some still have hope for the resumption of conflict and the collapse of the current ruling system.”

* Names have been changed to protect identities.